materialistic:

1) You know the best Chicken Katsu is from L&L

2) You know that cilantro is the same as Chinese parsley.

3) You measure the water for the rice by the knuckle of your index finger.

4) You know which market sells poi on which days.

5) Your refrigerator has half empty jar of mango chutney from the ‘95 Punahou Carnival.

6) The condiments at the table are Shoyu, ketchup, chili peppeh watah and kimchee. Also,takuwan, Hawaiian salt, slice onion and picked onion.

7) You go to Maui and your luggage home includes potato chips, manju, cream puffs and guri guri for omigaye.

8) A balanced meal has three starches: rice, macaroni salad and sweet bread.

9) You know 101 ways to fix your rubber slippers…50 using tape, 50 using glue and one using a stick for poke the strap back in.

10)  You know who’s under Chinaman’s Hat.

11)  You have no problems cracking open a can of Spam for dinner.

12)  You use your open car door for a dressing room.

13)  You know at least 3 people who get either one Honu tattoo, Island chain tattoo or both.

14)  Nice clothes means one T-shirt without puka.

15)  You are barefoot in most of your elementary school pictures.

16)  You have a slipper tan.

17)  You drive barefoot.

18)  You have at least five Hawaiian bracelets.

19)  You never, ever, under any circumstances wear socks with slippers, or an aloha shirt that matches your wife’s muumuu.

20)  It’s Sandy’s not Sandy Beach.

21)  You say “I going for lawnmower da grass” when you mean “I’m going to mow the lawn.”

22)  You can understand every word Bu Lai’a says and you know what his name means.

23)  You still chant “Hanakokolele” when a friend or coworker goofs up.

24)  The “Shaka” and the “Eye Flash” are worth 1,000 words.

25)  You feel guilty leaving a get together without helping clean up.

26)  The idea of taking something from a heiau is unthinkable.

27)  You call everyone older than you “Auntie” and “Uncle” and you kiss everyone in greeting and farewell.

28)  You don’t understand why anyone would buy less than a 20 lb. bag of rice.

29)  You can taste the difference between teriyaki and kalbi.

30)  You don’t wear your shoes in the house.

31)  You know why there are alphabets on trees or any posts on graduation day.

32)  You also know on graduation day by the time pau getting leis, you shouldn’t be able to see anymore.

33)  You know what a “stink eye” is and how to give it.

34)  You can correctly pronounce Kalanianaole, Kalakaua, Aiea, and Likelike.

35)  You say “Brah” not “Bro”

36)  You know what one “huli huli chicken” is.

37)  You can name 3 varieties of mangos.

38)  You know the difference between being “hapa” and being “hapai.”

39)  You give directions using mauka and makai.

40)  You know what “Hawaii Pono’i” is (and you know the words).

41)  You know what it takes to get into Kamehameha School.

42)  Someone says the word “UKU” and your head starts itching!

43)  You raise your chin for say “wassup” instead of nodding.

44)  You say, “Nori” not seaweed paper.

45)  You get confused when you go McDonald’s on the mainland and the Deluxe Breakfast doesn’t come with Spam and Portagee Sausage with rice.

46)  Your jokes are ’bout Portugese people, not Polish people.

47)  You know what (and where) “Morgan’s Corner” is

48)  70 degrees is “freezing!”

49)  You use “tako” instead of worms or fluorescent pink fish eggs for bait.

50)  You got lickins’ with “da rubbah slippah” when you was small kid time.

51)  You can walk through Waianae and no get mobbed.

52)  You know that “Kukui nut” is not one mental person.

53)  You call it “saimin” not “Top Ramen” or “Cup O’ Noodles”

54)  The surf report is on your speed dial and you always get one tide calendar on your wall.

55)  “Dressing up” means shorts and one Aloha shirt.

56)  You call it “shave ice”, not snow cone or shaved ice.

57)  You know pineapples no grow in trees.

58)  You know what Li Hing Mui is and you put it on everything

59)  You ask for shoyu and not soy sauce.

60)  You know the difference between sushi and sashimi.

61)  You need one relative to get one state job.

62)  You search your car for pork before you go over the Pali.

63)  You go to Neiman Marcus “just for look.”

64)  You eat spam musubi on a regular basis.

65)  You wear slippahs almost everywhere.

66)  You like ume, daikon, and kim chee better than pickles.

67)  When you gotta go bathroom, you say “I going shi shi.”

68)  When you hear the words fund raiser, you know it means Zippy’s Chili

69)  When a tourist asks you how to get back on ’63 you go “Where dat stay?”  (Hint: It’s Likelike Hwy)

70)  When you try explain the location of something to your friend, you use landmarks instead of street names.